There’s a saying, you are what you eat, it's more about the physically.
You are
what you practice, spiritually.
The worst
part here is, your kids are what you are, and this scares me.
Lately the relationship between me and my kids are terrible. Days ago, I was so
tensed, and I broke down, yes, again, loss control of myself, went in the room,
pray in tears, confess and cry out for help from the Lord. I worry about these
strong emotion going to affect my health, I’m feeling like I'm a manic and if,
I'm not healthy, how will my kids will turn out to be? I need wisdom, strength
and everything come from God solely. To leave time and space for both me and my
kids.
So, I have myself a 7 days' practice, don't say a word or have a thought, if
it's not a positive feedback, believe me, it is not easy, today is the sixth
day of my practice, so far so good. I'm fairly surprised about myself can make
this far and can act calm when I heard something disrespect or irritate from my
kids' mouth and how I, myself restrain my tough. I see changes in both me and
my kids, though, it's still a long way to go, and faith will keep us go on.
What I mean is, it's not merely another day to accomplish but the rest of my
life.
If you practice jealous, anger, judgmental, sad, pointing finger, picky,
lying, dishonor, nagging, yelling, or any negative attitude or viewpoint every
day, trust me, you will for sure, become good at that and your kids will only
learn from you, you both will become monsters. You won't even love yourself
anymore.
Ai? Artificial intelligent? No, it's a city that Israel defeated in faith, if
you read Joshua 7 - 8.
There are times, I almost losing mastering my temper. I have to admit that
the beginning of first 2-3 days, I hardly say anything at home, that's how bad
was my manner used to; I'm the mom, the highest authority, I provide everything
for this family and I have lots of pressures, so I get to say or do anything,
if I wish. Luckily, I have a job, I'm kind of escape or hide myself in the
office as long as I can for those days, otherwise, I’ll go crazy
This particular song, the upside down praying mantis in my backyard and Joshua
5:13 - 6:27; 7 - 8, they fight with me side by side in this battle of my life.
Two different kind of battles, won in faith. No question to ask, just listen
and obey, victory come.
讓我得見祢的榮面 See You Face to Face - 讚美之泉敬拜讚美專輯(21) 我要看見
Each one of
us have our own struggle, difficulty or so call battle to get pass, if you are
still breathing.
Do you want to live this kind of lives or what
legacy you are going to pass down to your kids and the generations after, don't
do anything regretful or stupid.